Increasing Your Self-Esteem - 15 Steps to Freedom
Low Self-Esteem is like a demon that sits on our shoulder and constantly nags at us about our failures, appearance, short-comings and real or imagined mistakes.
Building high self-esteem is a process, not something you can develop overnight. Yet, if you are committed to the process you have the capacity to slowly start harnessing a high self-esteem.
15 Steps To Raise Your Self-Esteem
1. Commit yourself completely:
Commit to tackle the issue of Self-esteem. Build the conviction that you CAN beat low self-esteem and that you WILL commit yourself fully to do so. Share this commitment with others and tell them what behavior they should expect from you. E.g. you will reduce negative self-talk about yourself.
2. Stop putting yourself down:
You can't develop high self-esteem if you repeat negative phrases about yourself and your abilities. Start noticing what kind of chatter your mind 'Golum' (that ugly creature that lurks in the dark to create trouble) is telling you. Refuse to accept this negative self-talk anymore.
3. Forgive yourself for the past:
The past is the past... STOP dwelling on it. Just learn from your experience and do not blame yourself for things that you had no control over.
4. List your positive qualities:
Are you Unselfish? Honest? Helpful? Thoughtful? Be generous with yourself and write down at least 10 positive qualities. Feel the qualities within you as you read them and take them with you everywhere.-
5. List your past successes:
Sit down and reflect on all the achievements you did over the past few years - and write them down. It can include your "minor victories," like learning to drive a car, graduating from school, etc. Read this list often and visualize yourself living that moment......recreate the feelings of satisfaction and joy you experienced and bring the feelings back to your present state. .
6. Stop comparing yourself to others:
Some people have more than you but there are also others who have less- you may be choosing to look at the 'half empty glass'. If you play the comparison game, you'll end up focusing on what you do not have control over, rather than what you can actually change.
7. Use power statements:
Create empowering statements that help to align your mind towards positive thoughts e.g.
''I am a confident person and I deserve success"
"I am a wonderful person of immense value who deserves to be loved"
Repeat such statement several times during the day, especially at night before going to bed and after getting up in the morning.
8. Take a Self-help Program or read books that empower you.
Whatever material you sustain your mind with will dominate and eventually take root to affect your behavior. If you watch negative television programs or read newspaper reports that sell on bad news; you will grow cynical and pessimistic. On the other hand if you read books or listen to programs, that are positive in nature and inspire you, it will be eaiser to choose to be influenced by these positive characteristics. -
9. Associate with positive people:
When you are surrounded by negative 'wet blanket' people who constantly put you and your ideas down, your self-esteem is lowered. On the other hand, when you are accepted and encouraged, you will feel better about yourself. So make a CONSICIOUS CHOICE of the people who you choose to be with. Also make sure you find someone with whom you can share your feelings in a non-judgemental fashion. If needs be, seek professional help especially if you feel any symptoms of depression.
10. Accept compliments with a 'thank-you':
Don't answer with a," Oh, it was nothing." when you receive a compliment. When you reject a compliment, the message you give yourself is that you are not worthy of praise. Respond to all compliments with a simple 'Thank You' and FEEL GOOD about it!
11. Do activities you truly enjoy:
You won' t feel good spending your time doing activities that you despise. Find something that really inspires you and helps you build your confidence. Self-esteem flourishes when you are engaged in work and activities that you enjoy and make you feel valuable. Even if you can't explore alternative career options at the present time, devote leisure time to hobbies and activities which you find stimulating and enjoyable.
12. Give more:
I'm not talking about giving money for charities.
What I'm referring to is giving more of yourself to those around you. The more you give the more you will receive because through each act of contribution you will understand that you are making a difference in other people's lives. By making a positive contribution you will begin to feel more valuable, which, in turn raises your own self-esteem.
13. Be who you truly are:
Live your own life - not the life others have decided is best for you. You'll never gain your own respect and feel good about yourself if you aren't leading the life you want to lead. It's important to start exploring what your True Core Values are and who you would like to be as a person.
14. Take ACTION!
You won't develop high self-esteem if you walk away from challenges or remain an inactive participant of life. When you take action - regardless of the result - you feel better about yourself. The fact that you have taken a conscious decision to take an action will help you to feel more empowered. So work on creating more friendships and take risks in trying out new things that give you a sense of achievement.
15. Relax:
When you get the urge to think negative thoughts especially about any past experience pull yourself back into the present by deepening your breathing. The awareness of the breathing will keep you focused on the here and now where you should be.
Start taking these small actions everyday and there will come a day when you will feel that you can fly with the eagles!
To receive a FREE Report that provides information on the 10 Vital Keys to Life Success and other resources visit http://www.insightzonecoach.com. or http://www.insightzonecoach.com/blog Reggie Aquilina is the Founder of Insight Zone Academy. He is a Life Coach and works in the field of Adult Learning and Development. He is actively involved in providing e-learning resources related to Life Coaching and he is the creator of the Life Coaching Home Study Course: The 10 PowerKeys Program.
Building high self-esteem is a process, not something you can develop overnight. Yet, if you are committed to the process you have the capacity to slowly start harnessing a high self-esteem.
15 Steps To Raise Your Self-Esteem
1. Commit yourself completely:
Commit to tackle the issue of Self-esteem. Build the conviction that you CAN beat low self-esteem and that you WILL commit yourself fully to do so. Share this commitment with others and tell them what behavior they should expect from you. E.g. you will reduce negative self-talk about yourself.
2. Stop putting yourself down:
You can't develop high self-esteem if you repeat negative phrases about yourself and your abilities. Start noticing what kind of chatter your mind 'Golum' (that ugly creature that lurks in the dark to create trouble) is telling you. Refuse to accept this negative self-talk anymore.
3. Forgive yourself for the past:
The past is the past... STOP dwelling on it. Just learn from your experience and do not blame yourself for things that you had no control over.
4. List your positive qualities:
Are you Unselfish? Honest? Helpful? Thoughtful? Be generous with yourself and write down at least 10 positive qualities. Feel the qualities within you as you read them and take them with you everywhere.-
5. List your past successes:
Sit down and reflect on all the achievements you did over the past few years - and write them down. It can include your "minor victories," like learning to drive a car, graduating from school, etc. Read this list often and visualize yourself living that moment......recreate the feelings of satisfaction and joy you experienced and bring the feelings back to your present state. .
6. Stop comparing yourself to others:
Some people have more than you but there are also others who have less- you may be choosing to look at the 'half empty glass'. If you play the comparison game, you'll end up focusing on what you do not have control over, rather than what you can actually change.
7. Use power statements:
Create empowering statements that help to align your mind towards positive thoughts e.g.
''I am a confident person and I deserve success"
"I am a wonderful person of immense value who deserves to be loved"
Repeat such statement several times during the day, especially at night before going to bed and after getting up in the morning.
8. Take a Self-help Program or read books that empower you.
Whatever material you sustain your mind with will dominate and eventually take root to affect your behavior. If you watch negative television programs or read newspaper reports that sell on bad news; you will grow cynical and pessimistic. On the other hand if you read books or listen to programs, that are positive in nature and inspire you, it will be eaiser to choose to be influenced by these positive characteristics. -
9. Associate with positive people:
When you are surrounded by negative 'wet blanket' people who constantly put you and your ideas down, your self-esteem is lowered. On the other hand, when you are accepted and encouraged, you will feel better about yourself. So make a CONSICIOUS CHOICE of the people who you choose to be with. Also make sure you find someone with whom you can share your feelings in a non-judgemental fashion. If needs be, seek professional help especially if you feel any symptoms of depression.
10. Accept compliments with a 'thank-you':
Don't answer with a," Oh, it was nothing." when you receive a compliment. When you reject a compliment, the message you give yourself is that you are not worthy of praise. Respond to all compliments with a simple 'Thank You' and FEEL GOOD about it!
11. Do activities you truly enjoy:
You won' t feel good spending your time doing activities that you despise. Find something that really inspires you and helps you build your confidence. Self-esteem flourishes when you are engaged in work and activities that you enjoy and make you feel valuable. Even if you can't explore alternative career options at the present time, devote leisure time to hobbies and activities which you find stimulating and enjoyable.
12. Give more:
I'm not talking about giving money for charities.
What I'm referring to is giving more of yourself to those around you. The more you give the more you will receive because through each act of contribution you will understand that you are making a difference in other people's lives. By making a positive contribution you will begin to feel more valuable, which, in turn raises your own self-esteem.
13. Be who you truly are:
Live your own life - not the life others have decided is best for you. You'll never gain your own respect and feel good about yourself if you aren't leading the life you want to lead. It's important to start exploring what your True Core Values are and who you would like to be as a person.
14. Take ACTION!
You won't develop high self-esteem if you walk away from challenges or remain an inactive participant of life. When you take action - regardless of the result - you feel better about yourself. The fact that you have taken a conscious decision to take an action will help you to feel more empowered. So work on creating more friendships and take risks in trying out new things that give you a sense of achievement.
15. Relax:
When you get the urge to think negative thoughts especially about any past experience pull yourself back into the present by deepening your breathing. The awareness of the breathing will keep you focused on the here and now where you should be.
Start taking these small actions everyday and there will come a day when you will feel that you can fly with the eagles!
To receive a FREE Report that provides information on the 10 Vital Keys to Life Success and other resources visit http://www.insightzonecoach.com. or http://www.insightzonecoach.com/blog Reggie Aquilina is the Founder of Insight Zone Academy. He is a Life Coach and works in the field of Adult Learning and Development. He is actively involved in providing e-learning resources related to Life Coaching and he is the creator of the Life Coaching Home Study Course: The 10 PowerKeys Program.
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